It's Monday, you're exhausted from a busy weekend of trying to get done what you can't do during the week (like watch TV!), and the front secretary is singing along to "Manic Monday" as you trudge to your office.
Your mind wanders off, contemplating the other days of the week beloved enough to have their own theme - "Throwback Thursday", "Flashback Friday"...why hasn't social media come to some consensus on an idiotic theme for the first work day of the week?
Anything to make the mandatory eight-hour grind of a Monday a little more bearable.
And then you think back to a world that existed before Prince got all googly-eyed over Susanna Hoffs who, at the time, was still a relative nobody. Back then, Prince was most definitely high on his own fumes, but he wasn't so far up his own, uh, "fudge walls" (?) that he was withholding his best tunes from us like he has since the '90s. In fact, something tells me a song like "Manic Monday" must have sat on his desk all of ten minutes before Prince said, "I'm-a give this tune to the first hot chick I see on MTV."
It was 3AM, of course, so MTV was playing the stuff that they would never think of blowing prime time air space on so Prince, grape Nehi in hand, probably had a nice chuckle at the New Model Army and Flesh For Lulu videos he knew he'd never see again, and then, BOOM!, it happened:
She seems almost hesitant to sing as the pint-size brunette stares daggers at her. It's obvious the tiny one is not used to sharing the spotlight, even when said spotlight is the rear view mirror and Mr. Nimoy is trying to see behind him to back out of their spot at the drive-in.
After a few seconds of trying to make sense of what he's seeing, Prince imagines some out-of-work movie director fudging his way into a meeting with the suits at Columbia and pitching the idea:
"Okay, picture if you will Leonard Nimoy behind the wheel of . The Star Trek franchise has fallen on hard times and he's forced to take a job as a chauffeur for an all-female rock band to make ends meet. His first day on the job, they get in and immediately bust into song, spending the next three minutes taking turns making googly eyes at him in the rear-view mirror while he wonders if they're ever going to tell him where they would like to go."Only in Hollywood, thinks Prince.
"You're hired!" say the suits all in unison!
Uh oh, Spock just turned the radio off.
Joe from Facts of Life fixes him with a dirty look and turns it back on.
Prince cannot take his eyes off of the little one singing the ahhs with those eager-to-please bedroom eyes. She's either got a serious thing for Star Trek - no, wait, that's the girl from the Go-Go's - or she's hell-bent on making Prince forget all about the blonde one. What blonde one?
And the light bulb above Prince's head goes on: "Manic Monday", the song that's been sitting on his desk for the past coupla weeks, the one he knows is gonna be a hit for whoever he gives it to, has found a home.
Never mind that Morris Day has been begging Prince to give him the tune, or that the label wants it to go to Madonna, that little girl in the backseat looks like she'd be a whole lot more fun.
Okay, maybe it didn't actually go down like that, but I'll bet I'm not that far off. And, hey, you got to see one of the weirder music videos ever made. You're welcome!