Top 10 Truths Of Rock & Roll

1. Any musician that cites Courtney Love as a major influence will, without exception, ALWAYS suck.

2. It's statistically impossible to look cool while playing through an old-school Peavey amp, much less sound cool. Unless you're "George Lynch" in a Schaumburg-based Dokken tribute band, do yourself a favor and step away from the Peavey.

3. Having a chick in your band is a great way to differentiate yourself from the millions of all-male rock bands out there. But, let's face it, having a hot chick in your band is the closest you'll ever come to harnessing the power of invisibility. Just ask Chris Stein.

4. Playing an outdoor gig in Canada may be more trouble than it's worth. Just ask Cheap Trick's bus driver or Radiohead's drum tech.

5. There are few things less essential than a Duran Duran live album. Hell, garnish is more essential than a Duran Duran live album.

6. The only reason to pull the plug on Bruce Springsteen and Paul McCartney mid-song is if the song is fucking "Twist & Shout".

7. Let's face it, Joe Perry's worst day is still probably ten times better than our best ten days put together.

8. If you'd have asked us five years ago which was too far-fetched to actually exist, UFO's, Bigfoot, or a Dee Snider solo album comprised of Broadway show tunes, we'd have totally gone with UFO's.

9. Chumbawamba announcing their decision to break up last week was a huge shock to the world, as most of us thought they broke up decades ago.

10. The top five worst things to wear onstage are (in no particular order): spandex, feather boas, leg warmers, crotchless chaps, and an acoustic Flying V guitar. However, wearing all five at once could very well be the most awesome thing ever.

Superior St. Rehearsal Facility

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